AI: Chicago Auditions

Chase-playing tonight, cuz I was busy rejoicing over Scott Brown’s win in Massachusetts.  Awesome!

Shania! “Man! I feel like a woman!”  Dude.  I lurve her music.  So… now we’re done pimping her out, so on with the obligatory Obama references.  Meh. Yes we can — get cottonballs for our ears.

First contestant, Katelyn.  She’s from a recently broken home, and TPTB (the powers the be) try to play up the sob story.  Her voice is nice though.  Simon and Kara both think she needs to put a little more heart n soul into her performances, but she’s through.

I like the personality of this second chic.  What the…  did she just pass out?? oh damn… I wish she had passed out!  And then oh my word…  She’s “bewb-boxing”…  Wha? She was cute and funny, but… um.. no. Not a singer.  Try broadway chica.

Charity Vance swears if she makes it through she will freak out and be the “crazy person on camera.”  Her voice is … wow.  She sounds good.  She gets to freak out on camera.

Que the Loser Parade!

And in walks Angela Martin. Things didn’t work out for her last time. She sings Mary J Blige “Fine” – I love that song. The judges think she deserves a break in life, and she’s through.

Now it’s time for the Winner Parade… A group of people good enough to get tickets to hollywood, but since we only have an hour tonight, they aren’t good enough for us to get to see them.

Day 2! Curly needs to go… he needs to go soooo bad that I just hit fast foward.  The whole Judges panel minus Simon tries to give the next girl, Alana, singing lessons.  She obviously doesn’t get through, and this obviously a loser parade.

Brian comes out… and he’s already a joke… but as soon as he said “my favorite artist, Tiny Tim”….  I hit fast forward. OMG… Just… NO!

Harold is looking like he’s trying to be a pimp, like he’s all that… He sings Usher, and it’s a no.  He tries to blame it on allergies, but Kara shoots him down, and he breaks out in tears right on the stage.

This Loser Parade is set to Shania’s “That don’t Impress Me Much”.

John Park is here because his parents are pissed he wants to be a singer.  They think he should “get a real job”.  He’s got a nice, deep sound.  Shania says he has a “beautiful bottom end”. Randy starts messing with her, and she changes it to “nice tone down there” which sets Randy off even more… Then Shania hits the hat trick with “you have a good head.”  Oh my word!!  Once the judges get over their fits of giggles, he gets a golden ticket because, well, he’s the best voice to walk through the doors all day.

Paige Dechausse is an asthmatic. She has a nice sound.  She had some pitch problems, but the girls think she has potential, and they convince Randy, so she’s through.  And she’s so excited she’s sucking on her inhaler.

A bunch of people are good enough for the golden tickets.  Thirteen in total on Day 2. That’s it.

Farewell Chicago.  Thank goodness.