Asperger’s Syndrome, The Second Amendment, and The Value of Life.

I went on The Dana Show during the second hour of the radio show, which is now broadcast on TheBlazeTv, to talk about Asperger’s Syndrome.  Once again, Asperger’s has been thrust into the national limelight under the worst circumstances.  I’m not even going to link to any of the myriad of news articles all screaming “The killer had Asperger’s! OMG! He wasn’t taking his medication!” As I explained to Dana, it’s all a load of bull-puckey.

I have Asperger’s Syndrome. Asperger’s Syndrome is NOT a mental illness, it is a neurological difference.  There is no medication for Asperger’s Syndrome.  Let me repeat that.  There is NO medication for Asperger’s Syndrome. Asperger’s Syndrome is often co-morbid with other issues that would be medicated, but Asperger’s Syndrome has no cure.

(Check out my “Not weird, just wired differently” line at Cafe Press)

Asperger’s Syndrome is a form of high-functioning autism.  Technically, after the latest updates to the DSM-5, Asperger’s is no longer an official diagnoses, but I digress. Typically, what separates an Aspie from a higher-function autistic person is their language skills.  Aspies can talk, quite well. Aspies tend to be very literal, and have to learn sarcasm.  They don’t generally look people in the eyes, often because the amount of emotion and input in the eyes is overwhelming.  Aspies also don’t pick up on social cues, things like body language and facial expressions, which makes them generally outcasts or targets for bullies.  Some Aspies pace, or flap their hands, or clap, scream, or whatever when overly emotional or over stimulated.  For me personally, I close my eyes to talk to shut out other stimuli so I can concentrate on what I’m saying.  I also tend to use headphones and music to block out the world when I’m overwhelmed or need to shut out distractions so I can stay on task.

I also struggle with depression. Depression is just one of several issues that can coincide with Asperger’s Syndrome.  I am well aware that Depression lies. In my case, I’m medicated.  My “Happy Pills” help me to keep my emotions level.  I’m blessed to have an amazing support system.  My husband picks up the slack around the house when I’m struggling to keep myself together. He’s always there to talk me through the worst of it.  A few weeks ago, I hit a rough patch where I just had too many feels.  He let me rant, rave, and cry.  My mom is amazing, and has talked me through some tough spots, and reminds me that I need to take care of the one that needs me most at the moments, and sometimes, that’s me.  My family has always been ready to pitch in and lend a hand when I need them, just as I do for them when they need help.

When I see people declaring that we need restrict the rights of the “mentally ill”, I get concerned. Ya’ll are talking about me. As I told Dana, I believe the real conversation needs to be the value of life. America no longer values life. As long as we continue to treat life as disposable, these types of tragic events will continue. 

 

Joy and Sorrow.

I love this time of year.  I love the twinkling, multi-color lights, the way the lights reflect off the ornaments on the tree.  I love the smell of fresh baked cookies, the taste of cookie dough.  I love the smell of my Balsam & Pine candle (it’s from Yankee Candle).  I love curling up with a mug of hot chocolate in front of the fire place.  I love the music.  I love the memories and nostalgia.  I love making new memories, and creating new traditions with my own family.  I love this time year.

I hate this time of year.  I hate the depression that always comes.  I hate the “gimmies” and the “I wants” that come no matter how much we try to stave them off.  I hate the commercialism, the Christmas stuff in the stores well before Halloween. I hate the stress that comes with all the projects and the “did I get a gift for that one?  Did we forget anyone?”  I hate the self-imposed pressure to be happy and make life all kittens and sunshine for my kids when I just want to curl up in a fetal postition and sleep through from November til February.  Hibernation – It’s not just for bears anymore!  I just want to avoid it all.  I hate this time of year.

But I love this time.

Christmas music makes me cry in such an odd mix of joy and sorrow, that I’m not sure what to do with all the emotion bottled up inside.  Certain CD’s especially remind me of my Dad.  John Denver and the Muppets “A Christmas Together” is one of them.  Good memories of listening to the record (yes, vinyl. I feel so old!) throughout the holiday season and yelling “Ba Dum Dum Dum Dum!” with Piggy.  It was always one of our favorites.

This year, I’m struggling.  This year marks 10 years since we lost our Angel.  While time has healed the wounds and lessened the pain, the scars are still there.  This year will be the second year that my GeekBoy doesn’t have a joint birthday party with his Grampa.  I miss my dad.  He loved this time year.

I wish I had his joy in the season.  I wish I could be free of the sorrow and depression that drags me down.  I try.  I am not entirely sure how successful I am.  But as long as the kids have a good time, and good memories of their own to look back on…  I’ll have done my job.

Outrage, myths, and nonsense.

The latest Obama ad, “Still”, pisses me off.  I was going to link to it, but you know what, I’m not.  Because I will not allow that tripe to air on my blog. you want to see it, check youtube.com for “Obama Still”

The ad uses a quote from McCain that he doesn’t use the computer and has never sent an email to claim that he’s out of touch with today’s technology.  What the asswipes running Obama’s advertising failed to realize – John McCain is not scared of technology, or out of touch with today’s generation.  He is physically unable to use a keyboard. Because they tortured him in Vietnam and broke his body.  He is too classy to point that out & doesn’t like to bring it up, unlikely Kerry who would manage to work Vietnam into every freakin’ sentence.  Here’s a clip from Fox&Friends where they discuss this very thing:

So who’s “out of touch” here huh?  Maybe the next time the Obama campaign wants to run an ad they should use Google to check their facts first.  This just makes me so furious.  It’s one thing to question a man/woman’s policy, but to make fun of a man who was tortured in Vietnam while you were smoking weed and trying cocaine…  well, that’s just not cool.  Not cool.

Oh, and for the record – I am so freaking tired of the old “But everyone has experiemented” arguement.  You know what?  I did not.  I have never tried drugs, never smoked a cigarette, and never had even a sip of alcohol.  So quit telling me “everyone” has.  I haven’t.

Oh, and to ice this freakin cake – Have ya’ll seen this??  Obama went to Iraq, and tried to convince the Iraqi’s not to do anything until after the election!  <- Source ->

According to Iraqi Foreign Minister Hoshyar Zebari, Obama made his demand for delay a key theme of his discussions with Iraqi leaders in Baghdad in July.

“He asked why we were not prepared to delay an agreement until after the US elections and the formation of a new administration in Washington,” Zebari said in an interview.

Obama insisted that Congress should be involved in negotiations on the status of US troops – and that it was in the interests of both sides not to have an agreement negotiated by the Bush administration in its “state of weakness and political confusion.”

Iraqi President Jalal Talabani (whose party is a member of the Socialist International) sees Obama as “a man of the Left” – who, once elected, might change his opposition to Iraq’s liberation. Indeed, say Talabani’s advisers, a President Obama might be tempted to appropriate the victory that America has already won in Iraq by claiming that his intervention transformed failure into success.

The Iraqis get it!  Barack Hussien Obama wants to be able to take credit for victory that Bush & the military have fought for.  And don’t miss the point where he tried to get Gen. Patraeus to give him a “realistic date.”  He isn’t Patraeus’ boss yet, he’s got no right to make those demands! And for those who doubt that he would ever really do this, his campaign admitted it!  To go over there and meddle in foreign affairs before he gets the job, well that’s downright treasonous! For real.  AHHH!  The nerve!  Obama and Pelosi both need to move to Iran and stay there.

But, truly, could we expect anything less for a man who took his campaign for President of the United States to Germany?  Like they can vote for him, really.  I say if he wants to be a “citizen of the world”, then by all means, find another country to live in, please.

But hey, when you’ve got friends like Bill Ayers & Jeremiah Wright…  well…  Quite frankly, I don’t want you to be my husband’s next boss.

Time Management

After watching this man’s “Last Lecture” last night, I watch his time management one this morning. Boy do I need to work on some of these things!! Here’s the video, well worth the hour and 16 minutes I think…

Anyway… some highlights:

Doing things right doesn’t always equal doing the right things. (aka FLYlady’s Housework done incorrectly still blesses the family!)

Manage Time like it’s money. Figure out how much your time is worth, and then look at how much time a task will take in $$.

You can always make more money later, you will never get that time back.

Being successful doesn’t make you manage time well. Managing time well makes you successful.

Failing to plan is planning to fail. You can always change the plan once you have one. Plan each day, week, sesmester/month/whatever long term plan.

ToDo lists: Break things into smaller steps, Be specific, and always do the ugliest job first.

Covey’s 4 Quadrant To Do List: 1. Due Soon, Important. 2. Not Due Soon, Not Important. 3. Due Soon, Not Important. 4. Not Due Soon, Not Important.

Make your priorities!

Inbox is not a to do list! ( I need to work on this!)

Use a calendar.

Learn to say no.

Keep a time journal, find out where your time is going and learn to budget it better

On Delegation:
Be Specific. Give deadlines, offer penalties & rewards for completion. Challenge people. Communication MUST be clear. Give objectives, not procedures. Tell relative importance of each task. Avoid upward delegation. Reinforce behavior you want repeated (little praise goes a long way)

Time is all we have. And you may find that one day you don’t have as much of it as you thought you did.

Finding the Tigger trapped in the Eeyore.

So last night, I saw something on MamaPop about Randy Pausch.  See, I had been hearing about him, and how sad it was that he died.  But I never knew who this was.  So I clicked on the YouTube video out of curiosity.  I was just going to watch a few minutes to get a feel for why so many people were bummed out, but his energy just sucked me in.  Before long, I had watched the whole hour and sixteen minutes!  At the end of the lecture, I teared up, and suddenly I understood why this man would be missed by so many.

One point he made stood out to me.  At the 1:02:04 mark, he told the audience, “You just have to choose if you’re a Tigger or an Eeyore.”  I thought about it for the rest of the night.

Tigger – “The wonderful thing about Tiggers, is Tiggers are wonderful things!! … bouncy flouncy fun fun fun fun!”

Eeyore – “Thanks for noticin’ me. Not many people do.”

Tigger is full of life and energy.  Eeyore is a depressed donkey in serious need of intervention.  As much as I wish I was a tigger, I think I’m more of an Eeyore.  The whole, “Woe is me” thing really wears thin after a while.  I’m not all Eeyore though.  I can be a Tigger when I want to be.  And I really want to be.  I want to be a Tigger.  I want to pass a love for life to my kids. I need to make a conscious effort to be more Tigger-like and less Eeyore-ish.

Meanwhile, I highly recommend ya’ll take the time to watch this one.  It’s an hour & 16 minutes well spent.

More then Hot Chocolate, Reeces, and Good Jeans

I’m studying Matthew 6:25-34 and it’s companion passage in Luke 12:22-34.  These verses on Worry were so important, God made sure they were put in the Bible twice.

“And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?”  That’s the question Jesus asks in Matt 6:27.

Jesus says in this passage that God will handle it.  Whatever it is you are worried, or “concerned” about, God will handle it.  Jesus points out that if God takes care of the tiniest sparrow, are we not more important than that?

So worry, essentially boils down to a lack of trust.  That lack of trust is a lack of confidence in God, and a lack of faith that He will do what He said He would.

“Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”  Hebrews 11:1

By Faith, Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Jacob, Joesph, Moses, Rahab.  And don’t foget Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, Samuel, and the prophets.

The Hall of Faith in Hebrews always reminds me of the Steve Green song, Find us Faithful.  (*sidenote – my dad taught me how to sing this one in key for a youth choir when I was in high school.  Miss you Dad.)

Each of those people mentioned in Hebrews had faith.  Faith enough to realize that God was in control, and they just had to follow the path He set before them.  Back to Matthew 6, Jesus says that life is so much more then food and clothes.  Our Father Gods knows what we *need* and He will supply.  All that is required of us in this life, is to seek first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness. (Matt 6:33)

Lord, please forgive my worried soul, my lack of trust.  I trust my husband completely, with my heart and life.  How can I not trust You, the Creator of life?  Oh Lord, please give me the faith of a mustard seed.   Help me to follow down the path You have set before me.  Help me to see Your Will in front of me, and guide my steps.  Please give comfort to my weary soul, and lift me up when I am down.  Help me to find the joy all around me when life is dragging me downward.  I want to leave the legacy of a faithful life for my own children just as my Dad left for me.    Amen

So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself.  Each day has enough trouble of it’s own.
Matthew 6:34 NASB