Motherhood Is So Much More

I pity Amy Glass.

Big Sister wants to feed the Baby

Big Sister wants to feed the Baby

It’s obvious that she has been taught that motherhood is nothing more than a box to tick off on your bucket list.  Likely this idea of motherhood as something beneath her, something to be derided and farmed out to the nanny, stems from her likely Feminist Studies professor, or worse, her own mother.  After reading her follow-up post about how much she disdains children, and assumes that the only reason to have a child is so that you won’t be lonely…  Well…  It made me wonder just how many abortions has this chick had, that she feels so viscerally anti-motherhood.

A quick glance through the rest of her short archive at ThoughtCatalogue (she’s only been blogging there since Dec 2013, and likely “Amy Glass” is a pen name, since she is apparently not on twitter or facebook) reveals a woman who believes her self-worth is tied up in how successful she is.  Beyonce is a woman to be admired, because she is so successful, she can have that baby, and hire a cadre of nannies to take care of little Blue Ivy while she continues to work and make money.  Yet this same author doesn’t seem to realize that without the cadre of nannies, Ms. B would have to take time off from her busy touring schedule to take care of baby Blue.  Somehow, the nanny working for and raising someone else’s child doesn’t have the same weight as that female CEO in this chick’s eye.  It’s as if all women should strive to be the Beyonces and the Marissa Mayers of the world.  But what Ms. Glass seems to ignore, is that if every female chose that path – who would be the nanny? The chef? Who would do all those little mundane things like dishes & housework? I guess that is all men’s work now, right?  Gee.  I hope Jay-Z has brushed up on his dishwasher loading skills.

Full disclosure – in my house, my wonderful husband does the laundry, because no matter what I do, I can never remember to switch the load from the washer to dryer.  He also pitches in with ALL the housework, because we are a team, and because I often either don’t have the energy, don’t see it, or just forget that some things (like vacuuming) need to get done. I do the teaching, the research, the refereeing, and whatnot.  I’m also an Aspie with depression, arthritis, & thyroid issues. I’m not the easiest person to live with, but he loves me anyway.

Me & my firstborn

Me & my firstborn

Point is, Ms. Glass is just another in a long line of young women who have been brought up in a culture that thinks babies are punishment, motherhood is something to be shunned, and your entire self-worth is tied up in your paycheck.  I feel sorry for her.

I hope that one day she will fall madly in love with a man who will love her and cherish her, and challenge everything she’s ever been told about men, marriage, and commitment.  I hope she loves her man so much, she has a child with him.  And on that day, when that tiny babe is placed in her arms, she will realize, motherhood – is so much more than just a box to check off on a bucket list.

Time To Move On

For the last 13 months, I have been heavily involved in the local tea party, Hampton Roads Tea Party.  My involvement started out simple enough.  I was contacted because my local chapter’s co-chairs were not well-versed in Facebook. and they needed help.  My position quickly morphed into “Social Media Maven” as I added Twitter and YouTube to the Suffolk Chapter.  Not long after, I wound up taking over the newsletter.  In mid-November, HRTP sent me to the VATPP conference, along with several others.  It was amazing! I learned so much, and tried to help our group incorporate the stuff I’d learned.

130914_3279Our little group became more and more active.  We talked to the Budget Director, issued a challenge to our city council, and even won some victories on the local level at budget time.  I met some really wonderful people, and had a blast!  We were making a difference! A small difference, but it was enough that the local government started to take notice of us.  The Mayor would search us out at events to talk to us.  One of our Councilmen came to a meeting to talk to us.  We began to learn so much about how our city really works.

By April, I had been made Vice-Chair of the Suffolk Chapter of the Hampton Roads Tea Party.  In June, I was tasked with designing a new brochure for HRTP to hand out.  I also joined the HRTP IT Team, and began to help the awesome volunteers there to transform the website into something so much better than it had been.  In July, our local chapter waded into the Sheriff’s Race & endorsed the Sheriff’s opponent, Jen Pond.

0820131945After that, things kind of turned into a blur.  I was working hard to keep educating myself and the rest of the group about the inner workings of the City of Suffolk, pitching in to help Jen Pond’s campaign whenever possible, attending all kind of events and meetings, recording HRTP’s now-defunct weekly radio show for the podcast, occasionally filling in on the radio show as a host, writing to the local paper, and trying to keep HRTP’s website fresh & relevant with news from around the state.  All while trying to homeschool my kids, and keep up with the house – which admittedly, I failed to do the latter.  My husband, God bless him, wound up doing the housework for the better part of the last year.  My involvement in the Hampton Roads Tea Party was burning me out, and affecting my family in ways I didn’t realize.

So after the election this past November, I tendered my resignation to the board.  It’s been a heckuva a year, and I wish the group all the best.  But I need to focus on my family.  It was a tough decision, right up until a conversation I had with my 8 year old.  He asked if I was really leaving the Tea Party.  When I told him that I thought I was, yes, he responded,

“Good. Because I missed you.”

That was it.  That cemented my decision to leave HRTP in ways nothing else would.  Good luck guys.  I hope you are able to build on the foundations we helped build, and grow.  But I can no longer be a part of it.  God Bless America, and God Bless Hampton Roads Tea Party.

Broken Teeth

Broken TeethMy Youngest was playing in the backyard, and accidentally smacked his mouth with the metal handle of the wagon.

Major props to the Dentist at Portsmouth Naval.  Technically they are only there to serve the active duty, but he took a few minutes to check out my son’s mouth anyway.  Luckily the roots are not exposed.

Since we don’t have dental, the dentist gave us a list of free dental clinics in the area. Yay free!  They are all closed for the weekend already though, so it’s going to be a rough weekend.  I foresee lots of soft food in our menu for the time being.

On a positive note, if we did the whole Halloween thing, he could totally go as a vampire this year.

Where is the Justice?

2013-911

I have written often of the tale of my own personal experience on that fateful day, September 11, 2001.  Today on twitter, President GW Bush’s aide Ari Fleischer shared his remembrances of that day. Circa Storified it all, to make it easier to read through.  Do it.  Read through it, and remember why we must never forget.

And while you are remember the almost 3,000 Americans who died in 2001, pause to remember the 4 Americans who died in an attack on our embassy in Lybia just last year, on September 11, 2012.  Remember Ambassador Chris Stevens, Diplomat Sean Smith, and the two former Navy Seals who ignored orders to stand down and charged in to rescue the folks at the embassy, Tyrone Woods & Glen Doherty.  Take a minute to ask yourself, why don’t we have answers yet? Why is a videographer STILL in jail, when it has been proven that his video did NOT contribute to this?  Why has the administration stonewalled Congress’s attempts to get to the bottom of this?  And just who gave the order to muzzle the survivors?

Never forget that we are still America.  One Nation, Under God.  Indivisible.  And that we are a nation that strives for Justice for All.

A New Cause of Autism?

I am autistic (Asperger’s Syndrome), so stories about autism always catch my attention.  When I saw this one, Inducing Labor May Be Tied To Autism Study Says, roll through my facebook feed, I had to stop and read.

The biggest study of its kind suggests autism might be linked with inducing and speeding up labor, preliminary findings that need investigating since labor is induced in increasing numbers of U.S. women, the authors and other autism experts say.

It’s possible that labor-inducing drugs might increase the risk — or that the problems that lead doctors to start labor explain the results. These include mothers’ diabetes and fetal complications, which have previously been linked with autism.

Like most research into autism causes, the study doesn’t provide conclusive answers, and the authors say the results shouldn’t lead doctors to avoid inducing labor or speeding it up since it can be life-saving for mothers and babies.

I have 3 kids with varying degrees of autism. But the one that is most affected, was NOT induced. There are plenty of factors in play when it comes to Autism.

One is genetics – it runs in my family.

Two is environment. There are way too many studies that show groupings of learning disorders and disabilities that appear in certain places, for instance near a power plant. There are also groupings of issues that crop up within certain occupations of the parents.

Three is medications taken while the mom is pregnant. There have also been studies proving that drugs in general can have a lasting affect on the DNA of developing babies in utero. A while back it was determined that a drug commonly used to stop preterm labor – Terbutaline – was linked to Autism. Because of this, it is no longer used to treat pre-term labor. I have had terbutaline, but again, my most affected child is NOT the one I had the terbutaline with.

Four is vaccines. I’m not anti-vax, I just believe that we load them in way too much and way too early. There is solid proof that the govt admits that vaccines play a role. The heavy metals and even residual DNA from cows, pigs, & even the aborted fetal cell lines used to make the vaccines can all play a role in what really should be called “vaccine-injured” kids. Thing is, if word got out that a small percentage of kids got injured by the vaccines, parents would refuse them more often. Big Govt & Big Pharma can’t have that now. So the vaccine-injured kids get labeled Autistic, and Autism becomes a huge cash cow as research try to figure out why there are so many different factors and potential causes.

Truth is, they don’t know what really causes it. So many of the neurological issues have VERY similar symptoms. Autism is likely several different neurological issues all rolled under the one banner, because they don’t understand any of them.

I have the best kids in the world!

I just have to brag on my kids, and maybe encourage some of you.  Just a brief reminder, I’ve got 3, all on the spectrum. My 12 yr old has Asperger’s Syndrome, Dsygraphia, & ADHD. My 10 yr old has High Functioning Autism, and some sort of processing delay – it take her longer to catch on to things than the others.  My 8 yr walks the line between Aspeger’s & HFA, and also has Sensory Processing disorder, & ADHD.  I myself am an Aspie with Dysgraphia & maybe some ADD.

Some of you know, I am HEAVILY involved in my city’s politics. I was brought into the local tea party in October to be their social media person.  I’ve since been named Vice-Chair. Our city is nearing the end of the yearly budget battle.  I’ve been actively fighting a tax increase & a water fee raise, by writing articles for the local paper & organizing our little group as best I can.  This past week has been the final push to do anything about these increases.

In the past week, I met with the city’s budget director & spent about 3 hours going over the budget with her & my Tea Party chairman on Monday.  On Tuesday, I spent several hours at a TP meeting, grilling the Asst. Superintendent of the school system on his budget, & putting out the results of our meeting with the Budget Director.  Then last night, from 6 to midnight, I was out at the city’s public hearing, and talking to people about the budget.

All that to say this:  I could NOT have done any of this a year ago. This week, for the first time since we started homeschooling 7 years ago — all three of my kids have done their schoolwork everyday this week, without being prompted, without having me sit over them, constantly reminding them what was next.  They didn’t give their father a hard time about anything on the days he was subbing for me. Just woke up, did their school work, and went on about their day.

Then last night, there was a 2 hour window between when I had to leave for the council meeting, and when my DH would get home from work.  Not only was I able to leave the kids at home, and trust they would feed the dog & not kill each other — My 12 year old cooked dinner for the other two – Kraft Mac & Cheese, Scrambled Eggs, Hot Dogs, & Toast. *S*  I’m so proud of him! And so proud of my littlest guy, who for years has struggled with separation anxiety that was near crippling, but was able to kiss me good bye last night, and has not freaked out about any of this.  Also, I’m proud of my Diva, for holding her ‘tude in check & not fighting with her brothers over stuff while I was gone.

Last year, none of this would have been possible.  We still have our issues. But I’m so proud of my kids.

My Kids

Conflicted

14 years ago today I had surgery because my body refused to give up the baby we had hoped and dreamed for, the baby that had died in utero two weeks earlier.

Today, my Sister-in-law gave birth to the second prettiest baby girl I’ve ever seen.  (First prettiest is my own daughter, duh!)

 

Autism, the CDC, and more.

So, I watched the House Oversight Committee hearing on Autism.

My takeaway – CDC & NIH are in total denial on mercury/vaccines & the role they may play.  They aren’t even looking into it.  As far as CDC is concerned, once your autistic kid is out of high school, you are on your own.  They have no idea why the rate has spiked so high so fast, and don’t really care to find out.  They are focusing on Genetics & Environment – but not the possibility of Mercury in the environment.  At one point, the lady from the CDC said that all mercury, aka thermiserol, had been removed from all vaccines EXCEPT the flu vaccine since 2001.  The crowd laughed at her.  It was also pointed out by members of the committee, that the CDC’s reasoning for ruling out vaccines & mercury relies heavily on studies done by a fraudster who embezzled grant money from the CDC, then gave them the results they wanted to hear.

The Representatives on the panel wanted to know why babies are loaded up on Vaccines so many so fast – the answer from the CDC – because not everyone goes to to the doctor on a regular basis, so we want to make sure we get them all, consequences be damned. Many of the Reps questioned the why the CDC refuses to even study the possibility of Vaccines in the equation, while clearly stating that were not ANTI-Vax, they just think that there needs to be studies & perhaps spread the shots out better instead of tripling & quadrupling up on shots.

At least one Rep mentioned diet as a cause/treatment. He asked what the CDC was doing on the end, and was told… um… yeah… we’ve heard that, but we’re focusing on the genetics & environmental stuff.  NIH guy just stammered around the importance of gut flora, but never answered the question.

The various groups who had representatives there are frustrated by the Govt’s (aka CDC & NIH) lack of cooperation & coordination.  Also seem to point the fingers at the CDC & NIH and say they are VERY close-minded to anything that doesn’t line up with what they have decided (genetic or environmental) causes Autism.

Personally – I want to know why the CDC is ignoring the impact of Vaccines & medications on genetics. I have one story from Britain that proves a specific drug altered the genetic code of the children of the pregnant women given it, and has caused a specific birth defect in their sons.  There have been NO studies on the possibilities of vaccines altering our genetic code, which – knowing what I know now about fetal dna in the vaccine – is a real possibility.

I’d also like to see the CDC study the impacts doubling, tripling, or more the number of vaccines in one dose. I believe that we pump way too much way too early into our babies.  I’d like to see the vaccine schedule revamped, and the doses spread out over a much longer period of time.

What’s your opinion? I’d love to hear it.